Thursday, October 30, 2014

10 signs you might currently be horse shopping: THIS IS SATIRICAL. IT IS NOT DIRECTED AT ANYONE PERSON. ANY SEMBLANCE TO A REAL PERSON OR REAL EVENTS IS PURELY COINCIDENTAL



10: You've recently seen a conformation shot something like this


My... what a lovely black horse that is. It's got 4 legs, ears and a tail. Yup. Definitely a horse. Now can I see what it looks like?

To which you get

You're right. Never mind. 

9. You've recently seen a jog video that looked like something out of the Blair Witch Files





                                                      OH! Was that it?? I think I saw it! 


8. You've put up an ISO (In search of) ad, for a 16-17 hh gelding suitable for eventing and dressage priced under 5,000, and you're currently looking at 

"She's 12 hh, can get really forward on trails, doesn't really like to go to shows and is priced at $14,000. I'm negotiable but not that negotiable"

Stop. 

7. Looking at a horse that is supposed to be currently jumping 4' courses with ease. See picture of this 

FlowingManesEquinePhotography

Seems legit. 

6. You very specifically ask if it's quiet even with an amateur. "Yes yes! He's great! Anyone can ride him!"


"He always seemed really quiet! I mean, no one else has ever ridden him but I didn't think it'd be a problem! "

No, horses are just like cars. Anyone can ride em right?


5. You have finally found a lovely horse that seems to fit all your parameters. It's got great videos, good pictures, conformation looks great, seems to have experience... 


"He seems a little off.."
"Really?? I don't see it at all"
" He's hopping on 3 legs....."

4. Or my other favorite.... "Nope, no vices."


So the fact that he's currently cribbing on my arm.... Not a vice? 


3. "He's a solid 17 hh" 


With shoes... and lifts... and a BIG hill....

2. Absolutely Upper Level Potential. VERY brave. 


Except on Days that end in Y. 

1.  You've found the PERFECT horse. Found a current picture, great videos, everything. You've hooked up the trailer, you pull in. You have your happy little check book all ready to write the check.....







No comments:

Post a Comment