Rolex Motivation...

So this year so far has been a whirl wind... I just got back from Rolex Kentucky 2014 - A great way to really hit the spring season running! Though I have been fortunate to this year again to have had the opportunity to head south not once, but twice already! I headed to Florida for a client and dear friend to pick up her horse, to bring him back up to Illinois to be sold, shopping for other clients, and on my way down, through the ending of Atlanta (also known as the Snowpocalypse), I brought along Red Horse (Millennium Qui) for a week of schooling and coaching. I was able to get in lessons with Jon Holling and Lynn Symansky, both of whom I HUGELY recommend riding in front of at one point or another.

Qui and I out for a "trot" with Guinness... aka a lovely gallop through the FL country side

Jon worked on a lot of grid work with my characteristically unadjustable horse TB. Qui has a 14 ft stride pretty much always, and struggles to keep a 10' bouncy canter together for a period of time. Jon worked a lot on me allowing him to make "educated mistakes" instead of trying to baby him to every distance, because as I always tell my students, we're never perfect. I was going to miss and he had to know how to adjust to that. By the end I was getting a lot more relaxed jumps out of him, ending with a solid training level SJ course that was relaxed and flowing, with a great rhythm. Jon is an excellent clinician, getting the most possible bang for your buck in a short viewing of horse and rider. It's sometimes hard to ride with someone who you're only going to get a brief view of your riding, your horse, and expect to take much home. But I have to say Jon was hugely educational, very encouraging, while challenging and giving me a great bit of homework.

I was able to sit on some lovely sales horses while I'm down there... 

Nothing teaches you more than simply riding anything and everything you can

Lynn had a much more old school feel to her, which I loved. She expected me to hold myself and my green horse to a much higher standard than I had been. So many of us ride our horses like babies, so babies they remain. We focused a lot on pole work, and again, keeping Qui to a more round, correct jump. She kept on me about every transition being accurate, my outside rein being more active, and enforcing correct, straight lines to my fences. No drifting through the turns, which many of us struggle with. Again, HIGHLY recommended, though not for those looking to be coddled.

Marlette "Marley" for his 2nd ride since November. I mean, common. He's so fabulous.

I came home feeling thrilled with my horse and his progress, and ready for an exciting season. I was then fortunate a month later to head down to Aiken, SC for 10 days to show some sale horses at Pine Top HT and Poplar HT, and get some early season cross country in for the youngsters. Good news? I sold all my sale horses that were slated to go! Bad news? I had two competition slots to fill at both horse shows, and no horses to ride for the week!! One of my fabulous owners stepped up and helped me to purchase a lovely young OTTB, Marlette aka Marley, as a new OTTB sales project for myself, and I brought one of the sold horses down to his new owners, as well as one of my clients and her horse for a week of boot camp with us!

Hannah and Youkon :) 

Easily the best part of this trip however, was on my way down to Aiken, I stopped in Springfield, IL where I have a lovely group of students, to surprise one of them with her new OTTB that I had found her that week. Congratulations to Hannah on her new horse :)

Full Gallo's Darth Mal and I on our way to a double clear stadium. What a lovely young horse! 

When I arrived at Full Gallop Farm (what a perfect facility....) in Aiken, and spoke with Lara Anderson (who is just a dream btw!) about my dilemma, she went right to work on finding me a new mount for that weekend! Did I mention I arrived on Friday, and the show started on Saturday morning?? I hoped on one of her LOVELY OTTBs, Full Gallop's Darth Mal, once Friday, had a lovely warm up, jumped a few stadium fences, a few xc fences, and off we went in the morning! I also dragged along poor Marley, who'd not been ridden since September, and did the BN dressage test with him to the tune of a 40! Not bad for a horse that missed his right lead and was a bit confused about the change of scenery! Mal and I had a lovely dressage test in the Novice and jumped around double clear in a big stadium round, and I'm confident would have jumped right around the cross country had it not monsooned the next day! But as eventers, we did do a flat school in the sand at Full gallop all the same ;)

Full Gallop's Kipper! Showing how fabulous he is on my first ride!

Full Gallop's Sundance Kid at Poplar Place!

Marley and I snuggling. I'm obsessed.

Marley proved to be an absolute gem of a young horse, immediately settling into this crazy new life like he'd done it all his whole life. Day 2 I body clipped him sans even a halter, day 3 he hacked the whole cross country course including water, ditches and small banks, Day 4 he started over small fences, day 5 we went on another xc adventure where he did some small logs, all the while never spooking, bucking, leaving anything. He took it all in stride. He's truly one of those special horses with all the pieces in place. This horse is now available for sale, or we are entertaining partnership options to keep him with me. More info on that later. During this time I also rode a few horses for Lara, as she has a string of just outstanding OTTBs at her farm always for sale, as she does a wonderful job of rehoming and retraining them for new careers, and she allowed me to show Full Gallops Sundance Kid at Poplar Place as well! He finished the BN olympics (we had more than half of our division eliminated or RF!!) with just a silly stop on my part. He has since sold to a lovely young lady in TN where he will continue to event! Go OTTBs! Lara and I have since developed a lovely partnership of bringing some of her quality OTTBs back here to the midwest! What a lovely opportunity for me, as well as buyers her in our area to get some of the best sport horse prospects in the country! For our first round, I brought home Full Gallops Kipper! He was one of those horses that within 5 mins on him I was like Lara! This is the one I'm taking! I tried 4 more... he came back with me :) He has since sold to one of my lovely young riders, and will be her event partner for the future! SO thrilled he will stay with me in my program!!

Isn't this what we all hope for when we sell horses??

I then returned home, rejoined the boyfriend, packed up our entire house, and moved in by my poor mother for a month until our apartment in Chicago is ready! Just a few short weeks later, we headed down to Kentucky for Spring Bay HT. I brought Qui (owned by Isabel Turner) down to do the Training, and Sabrina ( my own mare currently leased by one of my clients) for a tune up to do the Novice. Unfortunately, in warm up Qui stung himself a bit and we felt it best to scratch rather than risk any injury, and gladly was trotting soundly down the cement a few hours later, fit and sound a fiddle. Always better safe than sorry however, and he enjoyed the weekend for its environment and had a HUGELY educational school on Sunday over a VERY big Training track, coming away educated, sound and happy. I have not ridden Sabrina regularly since November 2012, and she has been with one of my amateurs safely teaching her the ropes, so she was more or less a catch ride for me! She put in a relax, albeit boring, dressage test for a 37, had a BEAUTIFUL show jump round despite one rail where I lost a bit of my rhythm, and then put in a foot perfect cross country run to finish in the top 10.

Sabrina being her typical perfect self. Huge thanks as always to my wonderful sponsors:

Turning Point Designs, Heritage Gloves, Majyk Equipe, Soybu Clothing, Revitavet, C4 Belts, Genuine Equestrian, and ISellTack.com 

Had a few quiet days of showing horses, vettings, ext, then I headed up with Qui and Marley to a jumper show at Silverwood! All three of us needed some more miles in the ring, and no better way to do it! A huge thanks as always to Laura Roseling for her excellent coaching, both the horses and I came away with a brilliant education. Qui jumped around 3 full classes with only one rail through 3'3 with ribbons in every class, and Marley ribboned in both of his classes at 2'9 and 3'! I was just blown away by the young gelding who just a month ago was getting his canter figured out again! What an insanely talented and level headed guy. Truly can't beat that type of brain. His owner and I would love to see him stay in my program to develop him through his potential, and have decided to open up to partnership options! This would be a wonderful, affordable opportunity for someone looking for an educational, fun, and unique way to be involved with an up and coming young professional and hugely talented young horse. You could use it as an opportunity to buy in early to purchase him and keep him in training for a much more affordable rate, while you wait for him to progress to the upper levels, then taking over the reins when he has reached his potential and having a lovely made horse for a much more affordable price. Or you could join in on the fun of a sale horse, and reap the rewards as his training and experience progress, thus increasing his value! Or you could simply enjoy it as a true hands on experience of the development process! Get an up close and personal view of what we do to develop these horses, from our daily schedule, how he's handled at shows, what the upper level shows ride like, the decisions I make for him, personalized course walks, what we do for preparation, his conditioning, a front row seat at our weekly lessons with area professionals, and lessons on Marley himself from me! We have lots of ideas and opportunities for the right person to join us on this fun journey, as well as references from current and previous owners!

Red Horse at the Jumper Show - Love him

Marley showing off how talented he is!

Last, but certainly not least, was a team trip to Rolex Kentucky! We had 10+ people this year, with more already excited to go next year! I was fortunate to be able to volunteer in the D box this year, where I was right among the riders, coaches, and supporters, hearing the cheers and gasps of great rides, and heartbreaking stops and falls. Not much is cooler than standing next to DOC (David O'Connor) and listening to him thinking out loud about each pair, and watching him step right in to help cool off horses. Truly reminds you that it takes a village to do what we do. What a wonderful experience. Can't wait to use so much of what I took away from this weekend in preparation for, you guessed it, another show! (Not before I move back to Chicago on Saturday!) Heading to Lake Geneva mini event on Sunday to get Qui out for a full run, Marley out for his first "event" at Novice, and to school some of my students! The weekend after that I will be down at Hunter Oaks for a Cross Country schooling (text 815-814-5179 to join!), the following weekend Friday we will do a dressage show with Qui and Quinn, Saturday Qui will do the Training CT at Fox River Valley Pony Club mini event, Marley will do the Novice again, and Grace (my lovely Connemara cross sale horse!) will do her first event ever at Beginner Novice! Then we'll head out to Catalpa for a schooling at Catalpa Corners in Iowa City, IA (again, text to join! 815-814-5179) and finish May at IEA in Indiana! Phew! Sounds like a great month ahead for the Gypsy crew!! And we still have 1 possibly 2 slots available for full training/sales horses, but those spots are filling up QUICKLY! Please message me ASAP if you'd like join our team!

Pretty cool.....

Why we write our plans in pencil with horses

Oh the joys of horses. I love horses, I love horse, I love horses. After the last month, a few too many tears than I care to admit, sometimes I have to sit down and remind myself as to why I do this crazy career. For those who don't know, my top horse, Man in Black or "Jag" or Black Horse, came in about a 3 weeks ago with a HUGE hock (Think size of a cantaloupe...) as he was JUST getting back to work for the season. It was in our last blast of horribly cold weather, and he's been living outside since November just being feral with Red Horse, enjoying their vacation while I got settled at my new facility. Now mind you, he was TOTALLY sound, WTC. Promising no? So I treated it like a muscle pull or strain, lots of cold hosing, icing, hot packs, you name it. Nothing brought the swelling down. Not even a little. After about a week I called my vet, and we agreed to x-ray it following the holidays with a pre-purchase for one of my clients. Out she came, and she watched him go on the lunge and was quite impressed at just HOW sound he was. We decide to X-ray JUST to be safe... and low and behold, first image we shoot. BIG ugly white thing blaring up the shot. Unfortunately, not a blemish from the machine. Very much an ugly bone chip floating right there plain as day. Cue water works for my poor baby horse who literally has no idea why I'm hugging him and sobbing. After a few more shots (only visible on one angle, so for those thinking of trying to get by on a cheaper vet visit by just shooting one view, here's a great reason why NOT to). The next logical step is to get that bad boy out of there. Now, I am BEYOND fortunate to have such a fabulous vet, (If you're in Northern Illinois, Dr. Lukas of Lukas Equine is second to none lukasequine.com) who called all the local (and not so local) Surgeons to find the best one we could get Jag in front of the soonest, with the best course of action. After handling all the arrangements, we planned to take Jag to surgery on January 3rd at 9 am.

And I thought I missed riding him after 6 weeks.....

For those of you not in Illinois right now, January 3rd at 9 am was about -12 degrees out. Needless to say my truck didn't start. I tried to jump that for 30 minutes, nearly gave myself frost bite, cried twice (frozen tears hurt) , called every mechanically inclined person I knew, eventually my mother saved the day and borrowed a friends truck and we were off to the hospital. Thankfully, we decided on Dr. Downs at Merrit Equine Hospital, which is just a short 40 minute trip up the road, and they were quite flexible with us. Dr. Downs had suggested STRONGLY that we ultra sound prior to laying him down to make sure we understood what we were going up against. We had HOPED that he had chipped it in a place where we could simply go in, pull it out, no ligament damage and he could be back to work in 6-8 weeks. As per the Ultra sound, it looks like the ligament pulled the bone off the joint, thus rupturing the small collateral ligament at the joining point. Not the good news we were hoping for. HOWEVER! There was a lot of swelling that made it very hard to see really what was going on, so I'm choosing to stay cautiously optimistic. We decided to delay the surgery a month (yayyyy more time to fundraise!) to get that (and I quote) "giant bolder out!" to wait for the swelling to go down, but he warned me that the most likely course of action wouldn't see Jag back to work for 6 months, and probably not competing until next year. Cue another round of water works.

Can you tell he's really suffering through this? 

I've just become an automated treat dispenser. And to think he didn't eat treats this spring....

As I've said to those who have expressed sympathy to me, the one thing I keep saying is that I'm just thankful that there is something to operate on. He has helped me to reach some of my major goals this last season, we have gone from unridable, to mountable, to finishing in the top 3 at all three of his preliminary events this last year at just 5 years old. He has a (hopefully) VERY long career ahead of him, and this is just a speed bump. I am in no rush with him, and we will take it one step at a time. He has nothing but time for me, and owes me nothing. I am thankful for a recent partnership with Revitavet, which I'm confident will expedite his recovery! I had great success with this product when he took a chip out of his knee this winter (have I mentioned I do love this horse.... most expensive $500 I've ever spent...) while working for Katie, and am very excited to offer this product to my clients as a PREVENTATIVE measure... hopefully no one else decides they need to do anything exciting for awhile. It made a HUGE difference in his recovery time, and we used it to MUCH success on horses that were tight through their back prior to dressage, and each time saw a change in their scores. I will be using it on all my horses (and myself) to keep them in top shape.

His version of hand walking... Have I mention I think he's part dog? 

Now, with all of this. I look at my goals I wrote out for my 2014 season, and I must admit there will be some reevaluation. I am hugely fortunate to have started working out of a great facility here in the Midwest, and I have some great clients here with me, and with that I have decided to pass on a full month in Aiken this year to focus on growing my business here. Instead I will take a short 10 day trip down there with Red Horse and hopefully a few other sale horses (if you're interested in possibly sending your horse along, please don't hesitate to contact me!) . Thanks to the generosity of his owner, Qui (Red Horse) will be stepping up as my main focus for the year. Our goal with him (this is like pencil right?) is to see him get some mileage in Aiken, and work on bringing him out this spring at Training Level, with aims at a summer move up to Prelim. He has really grown since his vacation, and his dressage is improving with leaps and bounds. His jumping is more relaxed, he's more self confident, and just over much more mellow than last fall. He's like riding a whole new horse. He's truly going to be a special one, and I'm thankful to have the ride on him.

Hard to believe this is even the same horse! 

I have also gotten the ride on another lovely OTTB, My Barbs "BeBe" thanks to the generosity of another client of mine! I sat on her this summer to try her for a client, and was just blown away by this little mare! SUPER athletic, an absolute blast to ride on the flat. I'm very excited to see where we can go this year!

I'm so excited....

I do still have an opening possibly for another competition horse, so if anyone knows of a horse looking for mileage, experience, campaigned for sale, or a stallion looking to be campaigned possibly. I'd love to finish my bronze in dressage this year, so would love something that could get through 3rd level. I've decided to really use this year to get more competition miles under my belt, and hopefully to keep building a great string of competition horses for my long term goals!

Your horse could join in on the collage of wonderfulness! My current group of horses! 

A pretty stellar group if you ask me...

Horses are a hugely humbling sport, and I keep reminding myself to find the positives in all of this. This gives Jag PLENTY of time to grow up, lots of time to bond, time for me to focus on my current group of sales horses, who with each day come out better than before, and time to focus on my clients. Sometimes we get caught up in our own goals, and forget those around us who are trying to accomplish their own. I'm hoping to help my working student Kayla get to Prelim this season with her Wonder mare, sell some horses so that some of my clients can move onto the next step in their careers, spend some time in Springfield with my lovely contingent down there, and get my Pony Clubbers prepped for their ratings. I know a year will fly by, if that's how long it'll take till I'm back galloping my big black horse. In the mean time, I'm going to make myself the best rider I can be so we can hit the ground running. I've made my self a promise, to not take a single ride for granted any more. I get on each of them with a very decisive purpose. Whether that purpose is a relaxing hack, or an intense dressage school. I want each of my horses to reach their goals, and then exceed them. And like I tell my students, any and every horse that you can ride is a learning experience. Get better. Hold yourself more accountable for each horses success. Make each one the absolute fanciest, fittest, and happiest horse that you can produce. So here's to more hours in the saddle, more days without stirrups. and a very happy and exciting new year :)

He must touch all the things... note the feed bucket he's helpfully placed in our way.

The next few months are going to be full of adorable Jag pictures... be prepared ;) 

Conditioning for 2014

After the seriousness of my last blog, I decided to a) find a happier note to post on b) post a bit sooner than I have in the past. Maybe I can keep this trend going!!

Come the end of every year, there's a lot of reflection on the successes and failures of the previous season. There also comes a lot of planning for the coming season, new goals, and new ideas. As such, a few of my goals for the up coming season are to produce more quality sale horses with a solid competition record, get to a CCI*, and develop my riders to each move up a level confidently!

I should mention here that I am BEYOND lucky to have a heated farm to work out of, so there is less chance of me missing rides due to in climate weather, but please keep that sort of thing in consideration with your personal schedule. If you miss a day, don't skip a work out. That's why I never put things to a Monday-Sunday schedule, it's always Day 1-7.

How pretty is this?? I'm quite lucky. For more information on my new facility, check out http://infinitysporthorse.com/facility or http://www.paddockhillsequestrian.com

As we head into our "training time" here in the Midwest, much of what we work on in the next three months sets the tone for our success in the next year. Your horses base of fitness is the best thing you can possibly do for them, so in light of that I decided I'd put some of my conditioning/training plans and goals on here, and try and track them every few weeks, so you can see the progression that my horses at different levels are making each month. I will also make note of their TPR (Temperature, Pulse and Respiration). Currently, I have 5 horses in my program, as well as a few lesson horses that I'm looking to keep more fit. Here is a start with Jag and Qui's training/conditioning program for the next month!

Man in Black "Jag" - 5 yr old Preliminary OTTB gelding. My goal for him for 3 months out is to be jumping around some local jumper shows at 3'-3'6 divisions, as well as schooling comfortably at 2nd level dressage. He will see his first event in either late March or early April.  Jag is currently still on his vacation from River Glen, though I sat on him for the first time yesterday for a 20 minute walk/hack session just to stretch his legs and remind him that he knows how to be ridden. He has two more weeks of pretty much just sitting in the field (he lives out 24/7 during his vacations so we can best let him grow and stretch his legs, and be as relaxed and normal as possible) looking pretty before he'll start back to work. When he does, we will do a week of 40 -80 minutes of just straight walking, briskly. I will try and do most of my walks around our trails so I can utilize the snow as well, make him work a bit harder, and some of that work will also include road walking as well to strengthen his tendons back up. Then real work will start up, all prefaced by 20 minutes of walking and finishing with 10 minutes of walking:

Day 1: 20 minutes trotting long and low.
Day 2: Light dressage school with circles, long and low canters off his back. No longer than 25 minutes.
Day 3: 20 minute trot set, include trot poles scattered through the arena
Day 4: Dressage
Day 5: Hack

Week 2/3

Day 1: 25 minute trot set
Day 2: Dressage school
Day 3: Hack
Day 4: Light jump school, with xs and low cavaletti, canter poles working on foot work
Day 5: Dressage

Week 4

Day 1: 25 minute trot set
Day 2: Dressage
Day 3: Hack
Day 4: Grid work
Day 5: 25 minute trot set with Dressage
Day 6: Pole work (canter/trot poles)
                                                                                                                                               

Millenium Qui "Qui" or Red Horse - Qui had 2 weeks off following Heritage Park, and then 4 weeks of very light rights just to keep him working as he's the type of horse that doesn't do well physically in a full vacation. He does best in a consistent schedule so too much of a change can stress him out. I'm just beginning to put him back to full work now that we're all settled in the new barn. His goal for 3 months is to be ready to ready to compete at Training Level, as well as actively competing in jumper shows this winter. He is already at least "partially" fit but because my goal for him after last season was improved relaxation and strength, he has different aims from his conditioning. He also will spend a lot of time walking to relax.

Week 1

Day 1: 25 minutes trotting long and low (yet forward)
Day 2: Trot Pole work while incorporating dressage
Day 3: Hack
Day 4: 25 minute trot set with Dressage
Day 5: Hack

Week 2/3

Day 1: 25 minute trot set long and low (yet forward)
Day 2: Dressage (includes trot poles and canter poles)
Day 3: Hack
Day 4: Jump work over little cavalettis and low verticals with 9' placement poles on both sides all trotted or walked.
Day 5: 25 minute trot set with Dressage

Week 4

Day 1: 30 minute trot set long and low
Day 2: Dressage - Lots of transitions up and down, improve straightness, simple lateral work
Day 3: Hack
Day 4: Jump School - Grid work (bounces, bending lines, adjustablity)
Day 5: Hack
Day 6: Course work at 2'

Learning To Sit (the trot, on the couch, or the beach or wherever else you might be)

I've been a big follower of Denny Emerson's page on Facebook for the last year, and one post really hit home for me a few months ago, about learning to sit the trot. You know what his advice was? Practice. Over, and over and over again. On any and every horse that you ride, every ride, for as long as you can, as well as you can. Some of my horses that I ride naturally have a more swinging trot that seems to pull you into the saddle, and makes it MUCH easier to sit. Red Horse (Qui) is one of those horses. I'm working hard to develop his strength through his back. To do this, I've focused on a lot of long and low work, and while he's in this lower frame he's not allowed to just meander. I look to really PUSH him into this lower frame so he truly engages that hind end. That's really what develops those haunch and back muscles. When he's at his best, his trot is absolutely unbelievable. It pulls you RIGHT in, and he just floats across the ground. I don't even have to work to sit his trot. The hardest thing for him is to relax through his back though. He can be a bit of a worrier, so most of ride the first part of my ride is spent on getting him to take that deep breath and relax that back so he can really move. We do circles, we spiral in and out, we walk for the first 15 minutes, we do LOTS of transitions, anything to not let him to lock that back against me.

Fancy.... from his first time in water this summer :) 

It's interesting that I spend SO much time working on getting him to relax, slow his mind down, and improve his focus, yet I'm pretty positive I can't think of the last time that I actually sat down and relaxed, let alone if I'd know what day it is if you asked me. I struggle with relaxing, sitting still, focusing.... Unless I'm actually riding. Here's a bit of a story about working to over come some of these things to put your best foot forward.

The Tuesday after Heritage Park, after a great show, I decided Jag was JUST reaching his peak for the season, having only started in August, and decided to head down to River Glen to run the Prelim down there, along with my working student who was running Training. That same evening, I got some devastating news of the very untimely death of a family member that  prodded me to take a week away from riding and teaching to be with those I love. Thankfully Kayla was able to keep Jag going on the lunge and with trot sets for me to keep him fit. I came back a bit the week after, though my head was very much still not in the game, I'll fully admit. It was then that I started to think about withdrawing because of everything, but as I've mentioned in past posts, it's quite hard to justify loosing the entry fee to myself, so I told myself I'd suck it up and just deal with it, so I could coach Kayla as well.

Thankfully Kayla and Stacey were there to make me laugh... :) 

As I headed down to TN, I spent the 12 hour trip working to get my mental state together. So much of my head was still back in Chicago, I knew it was going to be a really tough weekend to stay focused, and to really get the best of my horse. Part of me was nervous that he wasn't fit enough, that I hadn't prepped him enough, typical nerves exasperated by feeling very torn about whether I should be trying to enjoy myself, the guilt...

As I tacked up for my dressage test, I sat down for 15 minutes and told myself in a firm voice to relax, and just focus on my test. I went through it over and over again, I focused on exactly what I wanted from Jag, and what exercises worked best to get the best work out of him, and how I was going to spend each minute of my warm up. I got on, and followed my own plan to the absolute minute. Never once did I allow my mind to wander from anything but the exercises I was looking to accomplish. I dropped my score 4 points from the weekend before, and as the same judge judged all 3 prelim divisions I would have sat in the top 3 in any of the divisions, making me quite thrilled with how well Jag did, and how easily I could cut even more points from my score. Show jumping wasn't my best performance but my horse proved how much he's already grown at the level and skipped right around the biggest course we've seen to date.

Remembering so much of why we love our horses is for their healing power. I can't tell you how much time in the last month or two I've spent crying into his neck. 

When I walked the cross country course I'll admit I cried twice, that I felt like I shouldn't be there at all, that I was wrong, that it was too big and technical for so early in Jag's prelim career, that I hadn't done enough to prep him, all the self doubt came out all at once. So I walked it a few more times. It got better. When I tacked up the next day, my only focus was to give my horse the most confident ride I could produce. It didn't matter if we had 20 time penalties, it didn't matter about anything else but finishing my season on a high note for Jag, and feeling like he was confident in the level. And wouldn't you know it he dragged me around the course, feeling 110% confident to every single line, no fliers, no nervous chips, no misses at all. He showed me that for all of my stress and worry, and with 2 weeks of me basically leaving him to be lunged and trotted, that he knew his job. Have I mentioned how blessed I am to have this horse in my life?

This one is about the size of a queen bed ... 

The biggest thing I always stress to my students is the need for an excellent fitness base (thank you Katie for instilling that in me). ALL of my horses spend at least one day a week only trotting for 25-35 minutes, long and low, usually over hills. Jag has only gone on 2 gallop sets, and at all three of his Prelims he returned to his resting heart rate in under 3 minutes of coming off course in three very different climates. Fitness is about strenght, it's about endurance, and it's about one day a week where the horse can just mentally relax. I generally do my trots out in a field, but I ask for nothing more than for them to be either long and low, or simply just relaxed. No leg yields, no big bending, nothing complicated. But most horses hold this fitness extremely well, and once you have established a good base, it's there for the long term. It's the same thing in your training. If your horse has a strong base of support in their training, there is no need during competition season to overly pound them over jump after jump at height. Jag didn't even jump to height once before his last show.

Find any and every reason to be happy. Even though I didn't win, and dropped placing for running so slow, I was happy that I was able to put things aside and enjoy the ride on my lovely horse. 

And what I learned too is that there are times when us as riders need to take time to just sit. I needed to learn that just because I'm not spending 7 days a week 18 hours a day in the barn doesn't mean I'm not working hard. I needed to learn to work smarter, not harder. I was spending time doing needless things, wasting time at the barn because I felt the need to look busy so that clients would see me as hard working. I don't sleep much as it is, so I always felt if I wasn't working, that I was loosing ground on everything. And you know what suffered? Everything in my life. I realized with the passing of my loved one that I didn't want to get to the top at the expense of anything else. I wanted to have a life, a family, a boyfriend, friends. I wanted to have mornings that I slept in, days that I went to the museum. Weekends where I went skiing, or to a movie. I don't want to get rich (in any career) at the expense of these things. I want every time I   Yet again, I felt that at 24 I should at least be running around CCI** if I wanted to call myself a professional. Or selling a horse a week. Must spend more time working. What I really needed to do was to spend more time being a better person, marketing more efficiently, working the horses more efficiently, and being better about time management so that I could get the most out of each day, not just look busy. And I needed to enjoy my rides a bit more. I needed to learn to sit.

Oh dear... Me and Isabel (one of my clients) actually got all dressed up and went out like real people!! 

So in the 6 weeks that Jag gets off this season, as I have moved into a new farm (yay!! Check it out at http://infinitysporthorse.com/facility) and as I take on new clients, new horses, and new responsibilities, I've made myself really stick to a schedule. I've made myself take days off, be home at certain times when in the past I would simply beg for forgiveness about running late or missing appointments. I have made sure that those close to me, both at home and at the barn, truly understand how thankful I am for their support, of which I have been thankful to have so much of in the last few months. Every time we go through hardships in our lives, we should remember not to spend too much time being sad, but how we can use these experiences to make ourselves better. This Thanksgiving I went out, cuddled with my ponies, then headed back home to spend the day relaxing with family and friends (and making entirely too many truffles :)

The boyfriend and I. He's put up with quite a lot in 8 years :) 

As riders, when you give your horse much needed vacation time every year, make sure that you use it to relax a bit too, and know that you aren't what is causing your horse stress. And enjoy every moment of your life. Big or little. Enjoy your loved ones. Spend more time smiling, and less time stressing. Hug more, and truly enjoy each of your rides on your horses, and realized how blessed we are to have these animals in our lives. Sometimes we need to practice sitting. On a couch, or on a beach, or with our family.

Nothing but time

At 24, I've aged out of Young Riders quite some time ago. The U-25 program through USEA requires a qualifying CCI** which my horse won't even be old enough for until 2015, when coincidentally I WILL be 25, turning 26. This year Jag is only 5, and ages into Prelim (and a CIC** but not an Intermediate, you figure that one out...). Him and I are in a bit of a strange place with it all. Being a professional, there is a constant push to prove yourself against the best, have the young horses at the YEH Championships, be winning the FEI events, and climb up through the levels with as many horses as you can, as quickly as you can. It seems no one (read clients or sponsors) will take you seriously until you're a ** rider, or at least that's often the illusion. So riders pay to run as many events as they can to get their qualifiers, travel around the country, and run their horses hard to get to the elusive "Upper Levels". One ** horse looks a lot better on the record than 3-4 training level horses. Its also the chase for the multiple rides. Every professional wants to be running around like Buck Davidson jumping from one horse to the next, just to say that they have that "string" of horses. A lot of it comes down to having the money to be able to compete, fund the ever increasing prices of competitions (specifically FEI events) and the money to fund yourself to the top while hoping people notice your rise on up there. And then you look at the odds of one horse being able to go through the levels, stay sound and competitive, and fancy enough to get you noticed. So you try and bring up two, which we know is just ever so affordable... It's quite the racket if you ask me.

Fair Hill CCI2* winner Allie Blyskal and Sparrow's Nio. Photo by Jenni Autry. 

How can you not be jealous?? 

This year after Florida, I had such a different prospective on the upper levels and the events. I watched them more closely, and to be honest, quite enviously. Why couldn't my  last mare have been more of an upper level type that I could be running Fair Hill CCI** this year with her against people I had competed her against? It's so easy to find yourself to be sitting at home, refreshing the Live Scores, and being completely jealous of those riders who made it there. For me, I blamed the fact that I was sitting on a rambunctious 4 year old OTTB instead of a ** horse on the fact that I didn't have the money to get to the upper levels. That I had to try and beg, borrow and bleed my way through each show, counting my pennies just to save for the 7 shows I can generally swing in a season. I spent a solid 2 days in and around Fair Hill weekend complaining to anyone that would listen to me (and I apologize to those of you who did...) that if I simply had more money, I could compete more and get up the levels sooner. Whining that by now, if I was REALLY a professional, I would have been to a ** already. Clearly rational thinking at it's finest on my part.... (rolls eyes).

This is how I made myself feel better. Thank goodness for my new sponsor Body by Vi... 

In the midst of this bit of a mental weekend, I kept questioning why people would want to work with me when I hadn't "accomplished anything of note" or why people would send their horses to me when I wasn't "proven". Self doubt is something that I think is CONSTANTLY prevalent in competitive riders, and especially as you go through the levels, look to expand your business, gain new clients, ect. You will always hit a point of self doubt, self ridicule, and frustrations. If we are complacent with our selves and our riding, we won't push ourselves to make necessary improvements. We'll allow ourselves to grow mediocre, and not hold ourselves to the standards that make good riders GREAT. What we can't do however, is hold ourselves to someone else's standard of great. I was spending so much time worrying about others and where I wasn't, that I was forgetting where I was, and what I had. I needed to remind myself of the qualities I brought to the table to clients, sponsors and horses.

Thanks to this epiphany (and to my friends who helped me see it....) I realized I needed to adjust where my current program was at. I needed more organization, more discipline in my rides, more structure through my entire business. For someone who is about as naturally organized as a tree frog, this is clearly a struggling point for me. I spend probably 3-4 hours a day in the car between barns, try and ride anywhere from 3-10 horses in a day, teach as many lessons as I can, and sleep sometimes too. Sometimes my jump days where shortened by the fact that you can only get on and off your horse so many times, and I'm told it's probably not always a good idea to jump on my own. Who knew? Instead of spending time working on fundamentals of footwork, distances ect, often I just jumped to height so I could really utilize that jump school in my mind. To me, if I was going Prelim, I should jump prelim height at least once every jump school right? Wrong. Maybe I should do two jump schools that week, one of 1' high jumps that I am perfect to every time, and one on 2' high fences focusing on my changes and adjust ability.

Working keeping Qui less overly enthusiastic, with better footwork and quality

I really reevaluated my goals. Jag is 5, and had just run his first Prelim, albeit to me with moderate success. I asked myself what I wanted to accomplish. I wanted a really solid dressage test, a clean cross country round with no "misses", and a clean Show Jump round. Not that I wanted to win, not that I wanted to qualify for a CIC* by the end of the year like I'd originally told myself, not that I wanted him running Intermidiate by Summer 2014. I realized I have nothing but time. Time to make my horses the best that they can be. To be more tough on myself in my schoolings. I needed to be more percise in my transitions, not just on dressage day, but on jump day. My jump schools needed to be more focused on the quality of the approach, take off, and my position. No jumping ahead. No leaving long. No missed changes. My lines needed to be more precise in my practice so that it became more natural. My cross country schools needed to be more focused on my course work. I needed to learn to gallop to the fences with quality, and balance, consistently.

Normally this line might have stressed me out being a very upright skinny to a bending line to another airy, upright skinny. Jag felt as confident through this line as he did through a grid of xs. 

My focus needs to be on quality if I'm going to prove myself to my clients. I've said this before and I say it again. I want people to watch me run my horses around the courses and go wow, that's how it's done. I want my horses to find their courses easy, always. I want them to always be overly prepared, with the correct tools from day 1. So that is the standard that I am holding myself to. Not to being a CCI** rider. That will come when I have continuously brought up horses that have the tools that they need to succeed. The ends will follow the preparation. The months of sweat and hard work for truly quality horses of every price and talent level. It's something I've always expected of my riders, and it's something I will continue to preach. Results follow when you continue to hold yourself accountable.

You will always have days of self doubt, self frustrations when rides don't go as well as you hope, when you feel like you've let others down. Use these doubts not to bring yourself down, but to push yourself to a higher standard than you have in the past. Push yourself to be the best rider you can be, every ride.

The Trials and Tribulations of bringing along talented horses (The Black Horse Chronicle)

I am fortunate to work with a variety of horses each year, generally ranging from unbroke 3  year olds to well brought along horses with their particular quirks well installed. With the huge jump in the popularity of OTTBs (yay!!) I am also seeing a new influx of these in my program as well, from newly retired to restarted and retrained ones looking for a continued education. Each horse that comes in, requires a different approach towards finding success. Generally with youngsters I'm just starting, 30 days in we're generally walking, trotting, and cantering along and going on short adventures around the farm fairly confidently, with some limited off farm adventures for exposure. Some horses reach this point at just 1 week of actual "work" and others take 2-3 weeks. I'm working with a filly right now that has reminded me about the value of trusting your opinion and feeling on this sort of thing. The owner's I'm sure would have loved me to be on a bit sooner, instead of still lunging and clambering around her like a monkey, but to me she's always been a bit hard to keep focused past 20 minutes of work, and I can tell under her smart demeanor that there's a fragile little youngster that would frazzle with too much pressure. So I've kept it simple and stupid, always ending with a small progress and huge praise. Perfect example is the first time I sat on her, I didn't even consider actually asking her to walk. I was satisfied with just sitting there. The next time, I walked a small circle. Time after, we trotted figure 8s. 

Baby Olympics

To some this seems a bit painfully slow, but every time she has easily built upon our foundation, has never once offered to kickout, buck, rear, bolt, resist, ext. Everything has been very easy, and I'd venture to say boring for her. The other day I took her on a short walk around the property, and I was about halfway around my intended track when I could feel the end of our attention span starting to wane quickly. Instead of pushing her past the point of no return, I simply made a circle, halted her and hoped off. She doesn't know that wasn't my intended plan, nor did we face any unintended back lash of a short attention span. Will there be a day where I decided to push her through it? Yes. Do I miss anything in her training until that point? Not in my experience. If we let the horses learn at their own pace, I find that they continue to progress quietly and consistently, without the stress. They progress at their own rate, when they're ready, and you know it's never a FORCED reaction. I never want a horse I'm working with to feel that they are doing something (cantering, jumping, leg yields ext) because they are afraid of the reaction I will have if they're confused. I want it to be the next logical step for them, for it to make sense, and to be an easy step for them to progress to. 

I find this is EXPONENTIALLY more important when you're working with a naturally talented horse, or a horse that is inclined to be nervous. For Jag, my main competition horse, things have always come fairly easily (except mounting... details...). He never "actually" raised, only trained at the track for two years. He came to me at 4, sat outside for 3 months chilling out, and then I spent another 3 months gaining his trust enough to actually be able to get on him without him having a meltdown and running. To this day, I still don't even bother trying to use a mounting block. It's his thing and to be honest, it's not worth the stress it causes him. He lets me get on him from the ground without so much as a tail swish, which is a HUGE improvement. To give you a quick back ground, as a track horse I knew he'd been ridden at SOME point. They had workout times for him online, so I did a week of lunging work, laid across him from the mounting block, banged around on him, nothing phased him. Then I used the mounting block, and while he seemed a bit nervous, I waited for him to relax before putting my foot in the stirrup. No problem there. Then I swung over. BIG problem there. I've had horses bolt a bit before, so I was a bit prepared, but the problem with such an athletic horse? He's got an INSANE amount of push off that back end... So near broken neck #1. After a few months of work with a western saddle, some sand filled jeans as my mock person, and lots of patience later, I hopped on with no problem. So then we got to work on the "real riding".

He looks so quiet and easy going.... oops

 He was trotting cross rails a week going under saddle, and won his first starter mini event 60 days under saddle with a 27 on his Beginner novice dressage test, and a clear SJ and XC round. His first cross country school ever he hopped over a little ditch, dropped off a little bank, just like we were on a trail ride. Our first recognized event was less than 90 days actually under saddle and he cantered around beginner novice nearly on the buckle. He finished a very respectable 5th, mainly because that canter seemed so wonderful, I never even thought to check my watch... Oops. He didn't know any better. He cantered right into the water, handled the terrain and the environment with more ease than my two training level rides that weekend. He just didn't miss. So I threw him out in a field for the remainder of the year. He was 4, 16.2 at the butt and 16 hh at the withers. To say he was growing would be a gross understatement. 5 months went by, where I got caught up in my other sale horses, getting ready to leave for Florida to work for Katie, and the holidays. I planned to be gone through February, so I figured I'd pick him back up then. By the end of December though, I had sold 3 of the 4 horses I was planning to bring down with me, and was left with an empty slot on my trailer as of December 30th. So the poor feral black horse got pulled out of the field and tossed in the trailer, mane down to his shoulders, fuzzy as a peach, and as out of shape as could be. 

Progress! From first ride, to first BN, to First Training back 

Within 2 months of being in Florida, we got him back in shape, ran him one novice, promptly bumped him up to training where he again cantered around one of the hardest training's I've seen without so much as a blink of the eye. When he did it again two weeks later, I knew it wasn't a fluke. Katie and I planned out the next few shows, with a moveup to Prelim in the line of sight. Unfortunately, he's a horse. So those plans changed. During a late night storm he got spooked and clocked himself in the knee resulting in a small bone chip and a few more months to sit in a field. I finished my time in Florida, went to Rolex, and left him down south and took up a sale horse. Around the 4th of July, I had an opening back up in my stalls, had the vet do a quick X- ray, and with his Ok, I brought him back up home. I had missed him terribly, and was ready to get back to work. After 2 weeks back to work, and having him going better than he'd gone all winter, I came out to a 2 legged horse. What????? 2 weeks and a NASTY abscess (with a horse that won't let you soak his foot unless he's being hand fed....) later, we were back to work. 3 weeks after that, we headed off to our first event back at Catalpa Corners. His dressage was entirely average, much to my own fault of playing a bit too cautious. But his cross country?? Oh his cross country. He started off a bit wild, but then settled in better than I've ever felt him run. Just did not miss. His Show jumping was more of the same, jumped beautifully around a twisty course, and only missed on the where I rode horribly to, to finish in 8th of 22 competitors.  

Cross Country at Catalpa. Relaxed, happy, adjustable and brave. 

After Catalpa, I decided to really work on my dressage to make us competitive. He's a lovely moving horse, and is capable of excellent work if I ask for it. It was also very convenient that my original dressage coach, Wendy Sanders, had moved back to the area :) so off to Wendy Boot camp we went. She coached us the Friday before Silverwood, and we made some HUGE progress getting him to step up and carry his better quality work. It paid off well on Saturday when I went in and had one of my best tests to date, and secured the top spot. His cross country run was a bit... too bold. With no terrain at Silverwood, he found everything to be a bit easy, and was jumping very enthusiastically over the top of everything, dragging me around the course to finish fast and clear. Our showjumping on Sunday morning was clear, though not quite our best round as I was the first in the ring and let my nerves get the better of me a bit, but it was a very influential course with only two clear rounds, so I was thrilled with him all the same. It was all together a brilliant weekend, and winning from start to finish with an 8 pt lead isn't bad either. After only 4 training runs, the minimum for a Preliminary move up, I had a hard choice before me. Move him up, or sit at training for a few more shows for mileage? He'd found training level so easy, and been so adjustable on course, that after another jump school I decided to bump him up to Preliminary at Dunnabeck HT two weeks later. 

Starting to look like a REAL horse.

The big week arrived, and as I hopped on him on Tuesday before hand, I felt like I was riding down the side of the Grand Canyon... What?? My 5 year old hit another growth spurt. Excellent. Wendy even asked what was wrong with him this week. Ugh, great timing baby horse. But he still schooled well so off we went. I planned to take the whole weekend slow and easy, and let him figure out his way around this move up. Our dressage warm up was beautiful, thanks totally to Carrie Meehan for her advice from the ground that I couldn't quite bring into the ring myself, but still was a good enough effort for 3rd of 9, even with a swap in our counter canter, putting us two points out of first. Go Jaggle. The Cross Country course looked big, but very doable. So we warmed up well, though I'm still working on finding his ideal warm up for cross country to get him a bit more focused for the first few fences on course. As we watched the first rider on course, she had an unfortunate slip and fall at the first water combination. So I stopped watching. As I headed onto course, I knew for sure I was going to let him take his time, no matter what, and let him focus on his footing. I didn't want to have a silly slip myself. So off we went. The first fence went well. 2nd fence, he realized it got a bit bigger than training, and I could feel him hold off just a bit. The 3rd fence was a big upright white fence, and I wanted to take it a bit more like a show jump fence. He got behind my leg and we definitely struggled over that one a bit. The 4th fence was a off set one stride with a jump judge that had a beautiful rainbow colored umbrella that Jag just couldn't quite get his eye off. He again, was still a bit behind my leg and we jumped in and sucked WAY back, walking out over the out fence. Yes, I said WALKED out over a Prelim combination. UGH. 5 was a flier that went much better thankfully, and 6 was a double bank up to a skinny he took beautifully, and 7 was a MAX height, up right pile of logs he jumped beautifully. Finally, he was feeling comfortable at the new height. Now we were on the sight of the first fall. He jumped the first log of the 4 stride bending line beautifully, and then I took way too much away in my fear of slipping, essentially stopping him at the down bank into the water. I circled through the water on the back side, letting him get a better view of the combination, took the first log again and rode more forward and soft to the drop and wouldn't you know it? He hopped right in like pro. Up the hill we galloped to a crazy zig zag brush fence. Found my perfect line, and then I saw the jump judges in front of it.... Uh oh. Hold on course. No idea where. So we sat on the hill, making circles, working on keeping him relaxed but focused. After about 10 minutes, we were on our way again. He jumped the question perfectly, galloped onto the next off set two stride hanging logs, and NAILED the line, really galloping into my hands and exactly where I asked him to jump. Much better than our first combination... Then up the next hill to a gallop house, up another hill, JUST to be held again on course. Dang. Still no idea what was going on. So kept him walking again  this time for about 15 minutes. Then we were green lighted again. This was a bit of a difficult hold, as we didn't have a warm up fence, just back to work over a max height Prelim house straight down a dark hill. Nothing like hitting the ground running. So after a HUGE leap off, we galloped down hill to the the next water combination, which was a few strides into water to a pier, 4 or 5 strides to a max height bank up to a "duck blind". He came right around the corner, saw all the people and the combination, slowed to a bit of a trot into the water, and I pulled him up at the pier, let him take a look, circled around and attacked it. Could I have really gotten aggressive and probably gotten him over on the first attempt? Yes. Would it have been worth his confidence? No. He jumped foot perfect through the combination on the 2nd attempt and on our way. Two fences later was a half coffin with a skinny chevron down a hill to a bending line 5' shallow ditch. He was quite comfortable at this point, and was jumping around beautifully. We finished the course easily from that point on. I was absolutely thrilled to finish, let alone as well as he did. Shortly after, I found out that I was only one of 3 to actually get through the 2nd water combination. Wow. Here's a video of our ride through the combination of dread... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-sMDlniuz0

Glad we took the time to get a more confident approach.

Show Jumping was my absolute best round to date, without any question. He came out on Sunday feeling like a million dollars. He cantered right to the base of every fence, jumping with quality, not just his typical scope. The combination I pushed more than I needed to resulting in two silly rails, but over all it was a relaxed course that felt no different than a novice course would have felt to me. We finished 2nd, and while not a perfect weekend, I was over the moon with how my little black horse preformed. We had some things to work on, but over all I felt he was VERY ready for the move up. Everything has always come natural to him, so I think he was a bit taken a back by actually needing to try a little bit again, but it wasn't anything he wasn't more than capable of handling. So I'll take the next month, school him a bit more up to height, and we'll head back to Heritage ready to take names. After that, he'll take a much needed two month vacation before we start to prep for a trip down South!! 

I was quite proud of my special guy.

The Mental Obstacle Course of Riding

I'm a competitive person by nature, always have been, and if my parents are any indication, always will be. Growing up, I was a tri-sport athlete, an honors student, and rode 6 days a week while working off lessons at the barn. My family supported me in every way they could, but more than weekly lessons and some board was out of our budget. In every sport, I tended to find myself in more leadership roles, where I'd always encourage everyone to focus on doing their best, not to get frustrated, and to simply shake off the mistakes. Why, oh why can't we listen to our own advice??? One missed serve in volleyball and I'd start swearing, get down on myself, and totally affect the next play, and the play after... A great serve? Rally the whole team, get excited, make great saves. Needless to say I was a highly inconsistent player at best... Good days I could compete with the best of them, bad days I should have just gotten off the court. Even track, I'd find myself in my own head, worried about an old injury or about proving the coaches picked the right person to run. I was a natural athlete, but NOT a natural competitor. Finally my sophomore year of high school and varsity track (after a particularly embarrassing mistake on my part), my coach sat me down and handed me a meditation CD. He told me to get out of my head, focus on what I needed to accomplish, and bring ONLY that to the line. I lived with that CD in  my disc man for 2 years. In those two years, I set 3 school records, qualified in two events for State, won 4 different invitationals and finally was doing more than just preaching to Choir. I was preforming as well as I was practicing, and learning to let go of the external stresses.

My Zen Meditation Pose

Now to bring that over to my horses. Seems easy enough right? As someone with a limited budget, I've always had to pick and choose my show schedule. Shows were always very limited, and in that respect, a BIG deal to me.  I love to compete, love the thrill of the chase, the adrenaline rush, the whole lot of it. My problem, is that when I go to shows, I am already worried. To me, it's THIS show. There's no, well if we don't have a great run, there's always next week. If I was lucky, there was always next month. Horse not quite dragging me to the jump that day? Well I'm not going to throw away $300 because Star just wasn't feeling it today. Suck it up and kick on. Dressage was and is a constant lesson in preparation, ring time, and learning how much space you have in the sand box. Learning to manipulate those precious minutes before your test to REALLY get your horse ready for the ring. When you compete often, you learn a routine that works for you and your horse, you learn what doesn't work for your horse. 3 times in a year is hard to figure out how your horse likes to be prepared. Or so I told myself for a long time.

With this mentality, I always felt "behind" the competitors that could afford to be out competing every weekend, practicing their test in the ring, and they always seemed less affected by the environment of the show. I'd get all nervous that I wanted to make it worth the money we spent to get there, make my coaches proud of all the work I'd done, and I'd proceed to go in and panic.  I caused myself constantly to go in to the ring with a bitter taste in my mouth of being nervous, rushed, and woefully unprepared, even when this was far from the case. I was always measuring myself against the next rider. Was my horse as fancy? Should I be competing higher already? Was my jacket fancy enough? My stall set up right? WAY too many things to actually think about putting in MY horses best test to OUR ability.

How I felt doing Dressage (ok so this is one of my old students and a dear friend, but still one of my all time favorite pictures. This was actually a great jump, not that you can tell from here... haha)

To say this produced a few years of less than stellar results would be an understatement. I did one thing though in hind sight. I'd get so mad at myself about a poor dressage test, that I'd go out on cross country with a determination to go clear and fast, and move up from there. I was focused on this goal. And wouldn't you know it, I CONSISTENTLY produced clear, fast (ok often TOO fast) cross country rounds, on just about any horse I was on. This also came from a no excuses way of thinking that even on a bad day, I wasn't just going to be able to afford to retire. We were going to get through it. I rode with a determination, a clear plan, and heart. This gave me the confidence to start really thinking of myself as a cross country rider, and that again, pushed me to continue to get those results. Positive mental attitude, positive results. Negative, distracted, blaming attitude for dressage? Not so much. Stadium again, I'd blame my saddle, or my horse, or the course, or this or that. I just never came in with the same ride I'd warm up with . I'd panic and simply worry about trying to go clean, instead of riding the course.

A throw back to my first Prelim. Dressage wasn't pretty, but man did we get around cross country! We produced the only double clear round that day, and moved from 11th to 4th. 

A few years ago, I was given the opportunity to show strictly dressage, and I competed through 2nd level. I learned to over prepare my horse for the level. Showing 1st level? Your horse should be starting to think about 3rd. You should not be barely scraping through those 1st level movements. The more over prepared my horse was, and the better I learned to use the sand box, those results started to fall over in to my eventing. My training horses were fit enough to run preliminary, jumping prelim combinations, and training began to look and feel easy to them. I started producing consistent scores, while not always brilliant, at least I was no longer all over the board. I knew what my horses SHOULD feel like before I get in the ring, and was beginning to replicate my warm up in the ring, and ride the horse, not the test.

On our way to qualifying for regionals, as well as winning high point. Forgive my hunt cap. 

To me it is still a battle, every day, to not let myself compare myself, my horses, or my business to others. Some people will always have more money, more natural talent, fancier horses, and more business sense than I do. But at the end of the day, that can't matter. I have to come into the barn each day with a clear, determined plan of how to accomplish MY goals for that day, month and year. I have to bring my horses along at MY pace, not worry about being the youngest rider to go to the Olympics, or to score the lowest dressage test ever to get on Eventing Nation. Do I want to be recognized for my hard work? Who doesn't?? I was on cloud 9 the first time I saw my name in a magazine under a little headway that said Silverwood and listed me as 2nd place. I taped that on my fridge for months... But now I keep tabs on my personal accomplishments, and make myself proud. A year and a half ago, I couldn't even get ON Jag, and two weeks ago he finished his 3rd training (and only 5th recognized show ever) with only a rail to his dressage score. Will we be in a magazine for the results? No. Will I be on Eventing Nation's Got Talent? Probably not. Did I cry calling my Dad to tell him about how proud I was of my little ChinChilla?? You better believe I did.

From first ride, to first BN, to his latest Training. What a special horse he's become in a little over a year. 

 I always tell others that my goal is not to make it onto the Olympic team. No matter what I do, I can't guarantee that because in Eventing, a committee decides that. Look at Shinead Halpin and Alison Springer, arguably the best two women riders in our country right now, with top 3 placings at WORLD class events. Both passed over for the Olympic Team. What more could they have done? When I am consistently producing results, I won't be able to be ignored. If I am consistently winning, I won't be able to be ignored. I just have to focus on producing the best results I can produce, not worry about beating someone else's scores. Will there be shows that you felt you laid down a 20 test and the judge sees a 40 test? Absolutely. Come back 4 more times with that test, and judges will notice.

Always remember, we all fight our own battles. Even the most talented riders have skeletons in their closets, as do the fanciest horses.